Mare Answers

Dear Panel:

I have just been recently married to someone I have "dated" for eight years. It was a rocky relationship, he never really treated me very well, always putting me down, and pushing me away. Well, I got pregnant in 1997, and later had a beautiful baby boy in 1998, he, because of this event, finally wanted to marry me, so we were wed in 1999. Now, I reluctantly have fallen in love with another man. One who is my best friend, extremely intelligent, very sensitive, and never a harsh word from his lips. (I've actually known this person for about four years now)His says he is in love with me too, actually he said it first, and is quite confident that I am the "one". I really think I have married the wrong man, what should I do?

heartsick

Mare Answers:

Your Marriage Is Over

I know some of the other panelists are going to call on the sanctity of marriage and tell you to get marital counseling, but it

Of course marriage is sacred

sounds like your relationship with your husband is over. If he treats you badly, get out. Tina Turner left Ike for a good reason and she's a better woman for it today.

As for your new love, you're not going to like this and you're probably not going to do it -- but hear me out. I don't think you should enter into a new relationship immediately. You need to answer some of your OWN questions -- such as, Why did I stay with an unloving husband for 10 years? Why did I get involved with someone new when I was already in a relationship?

I agree, because only her can know what makes her happy.

and most importantly, What do I want to do with my life? What values are important to me? If this "other man" truly respects you, he'll still be around when you figure out what you want to do.

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