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Dear
Panel,
Hi.
I never do these advice things, but I am kind of desperate. :-O
I am in love with a man that I met in 1991. When we first met, I
fell HARD for him. I trembled whenever he walked into a room, I
got butterflies whenever I would talk to him face to face, on the
phone, etc...We were never intimate, and always "just friends".
We came really close to "making out" in a drunken stupor
one night, but he stopped it and said that we shouldn't since we
were "friends". Well, the years went by, we both had our
own lives and relationships and kind of lost touch with each other
for while as well. Now, due to the recent death of a close friend
back in February, we met up again at the funeral. He is now a part
of our "friends gang" once again, and though he lives
in a neighboring state now, he drives in every other weekend or
so to hang out with us. The very MINUTE I saw him again for the
first time, all of those feelings came flooding back. I still tremble
in his presence, get butterflies when I talk to him, and just basically
think about him all the time.! I am now where I was in 91' only
to a stronger degree.
I am in a relationship right now that will be coming to an end on
Friday. (Not because of this but because we are just not right for
one another and I would rather us end things on an amicable note
and be friends than to keep fussing and arguing and end up enemies.
It has been escalating for over a year now). The man that I am "with"
now also happens to be really close friends with the man that I
am in love with. Not sure if this would complicate things, but it
might.
He has NO idea that I am having these "feelings" for him
again, and I am afraid that if he knew it might scare him off. I
feel that he is absolutely GORGEOUS and I feel that I am just "mediocre"
from a looks standpoint, but I am working on getting in shape (have
lost 25 pounds in 3 months) and bettering my appearance and by extension,
my outlook on life, and my self-esteem.
My question is this: SHOULD I tell him how I am feeling, or should
I just leave it alone and just consider him my "fantasy man"...?
He is absolutely everything that I have ever wanted in a man and
then some.
I am so confused and frustrated right now. And scared. Help?
Thanks so much...
Confused Mid 30's Gal
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