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Dear Hitting the Road-
Knowing When It's Over
It's time to get out of a relationship when you find yourself being
mad or hurt or sad more often than you are happy. When you
are with somebody that loves you, and that you love, you should
never feel alone in the world.
The "Perfect" Couple
My first serious relationship was when I was 15. I was so
in love with this guy. He was gorgeous, a couple years older
than I was, and I thought that we were perfect together. In
fact, he thought we were perfect together. Our parents even
thought we were perfect for each other. Everybody in school
thought we were perfect together.
At first, everything was great. I only wanted to spend time
with him because we always had so much fun together. After
6 months together, we lost our virginity together. It was special
and I could never regret how wonderful my first time was, and every
time after.
His Baggage
As time progressed, we were even more attached and he was aggressively
protective of me. He revealed many private things to me –
he came from a broken family and had TONS of baggage. He started
trying to keep me from wearing makeup because he asked, "Who are
you trying to be sexy for?" He was a pro skateboarder and
gave it up so he could be with me on weekends. He would get
insanely angry if he saw me happy without him, then would break
down and cry, apologetic for his behavior.
Time To Let Go
After a year and a half of the relationship, we were at dinner
with my parents at a restaurant and the waiter came to take our
orders and was flirting with everyone, not just me, but my boyfriend
freaked out and went to the bathroom. My mom looked at me
and told me, "I haven't seen you happy in a long time, maybe its
time to let it go."
I just started crying because I had known it was over long before,
but there were so many things to be afraid of. I had isolated
myself from all of my friends, and even worse, my friends had all
become really good friends with him. I was afraid of being
alone, afraid of never finding someone as good looking or as open
as he was. But I knew I had to. I felt it in my stomach, I
felt it in my heart, and I knew it in my head.
If You Don't Know, Everyone Else Does
I think that you know, too. You just know. And if you
don't, everybody else does. If your mom can ask you if you're
happy, or if your best friend is telling you that you've changed,
you just know. It's time.
Be Glad That It Hurts
And of course it's not easy. But it wasn't easy evolving
into the relationship that you have (or had) either. But a
new beginning can't happen without a stop to something else first.
I never thought that I would say this either, but be glad that it
hurts. It's the hurt that makes happiness so great.
If we were happy all of the time, happiness would cease to exist.
And there is happiness available to you, when you're ready to let
this baggage go.
– Alicia
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