Hope said:

....he is using you.

I absolutley disagree.  If he is using her, then wouldn't it be the same, vice -versa, and she is using him too?  He is seeing someone, but not committed, there is nothing wrong with dating other(s).  And from the girl's letter, I get the impression he is just as torn apart by this as she is.  Just as confused.  It is not cut and dry, not black and white.  In situations like this, there are many feelings all tumbling together which can be very confusing.  I do not agree with the idea that he is using her at all.  He is just as emotionally mixed up as she. thegirlnextdoor