Dear Lost Love,

What is it about this woman that makes you want to keep "playing yourself" again and again (that means, making yourself look foolish, and hurting yourself). And what's so hot about the guy that the woman you adore is with, that she has to sit back and take his crap too!

Do You Value Yourself Enough?

Do you value yourself enough to move on if this woman can't honestly give you what you need at minimum? And what you need is her! Does she value herself enough to leave this guy who doesn't give her what she needs? You never said why she couldn't leave this guy in the first place. Do you even know why?

Here's my take on this issue. There are at least two major issues you must deal with:

1) (I know this sounds like cliche psychobabble) Your self esteem/Her self esteem and why you guys can't leave "relationships" that don't benefit you.

Of course she is fooling him, Actions speak louder than words.

2) Is she fooling you or herself?-Are you both really sure she wants to be with you?

My advice to you before you do anything: Sit and think logically, "Is she really worth the heartache?" "Is this really going to happen between her and I?" "Why do I love her?" "Do I really love her?" "Does she really love me?" After you ask yourself these questions and you still think she's the one, then go to her and ask her whom she really wants to be with. If she gives you the run-around, "I love you but..." Listen to no more of what she has to say. Tell her that you are not going to wait around like a sucker for her to leave her lover.

This is not an old limey romantic love story and if she or you have fooled yourselves into believing that you are soulmates and you are meant to be and her man is the only obstacle that makes your heart ache, then you're wrong. This is reality babe, and real love doesn't mean you treat people you love this way. And if you really love yourself, you'll 86 this whole concept of you being together and realize that it is not meant to be.

Don't think that I'm not sensitive enough to know that this is going to be hard. I've been through situations where I've had to choose the romanticism of waiting for him to come around or realizing that I'm worth more. So ask yourself this question: "How much are you worth?"