Dear Waiting for Love,

What kind of relationships are these?

I have heard similar comments to yours, Waiting. In most cases, I wonder what kind of relationship exists before the girl gets dumped. If you met the guy at a bar, go out twice with him, and then he insists on having sex with you "or else", is this the situation you're referring to?

On the other hand, do you go out with these guys for a couple of years, form a strong and lasting friendship, and then the ultimatum of" sex or else" is given?

You're Meeting the Wrong Guys

I disagree because ALL guys want sex and want it soon – right ones and wrong ones.

I have just described 2 fairly extreme scenarios, but I suspect that you are nearer to the former. Somewhat like the girl who was extremely impressed by the bar bouncer who "lived life to the fullest", I suspect you are meeting and pining over the wrong guys. Also, if you are meeting these guys at your religious place of worship, I say go tell the rabbi on them.

Are you limiting your options?

Why are you assuming it's until marriage? Maybe she's just waiting until SHE'S ready.

Obviously if your requirements are that guys must desire a virgin status (until marriage, I'm assuming), then you have limited your dating pool. This is not a bad thing in that hopefully you've eliminated those scumbag males who are only interested in quenching their raging hormones.

Maybe a little harsh, Lefty—wanting sex doesn't make them evil scumbags.

Still, there are a range of males out there, and you want to look for those guys whose desires match your own. Either that or you can get married after the second date and solve the problem really quick.

– Lefty