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Dear Sean,
You can either spend
a lot of time beating K and yourself up, or you can put things in
the best light possible and go on.
People do change in college.
Their interests change, living situations change, politics change,
and yes, friends change.
K
May Have Had Good Reasons
K may have spent a lot
of time with this other guy, J, studying or doing whatever, but
maybe she didn't tell you about it because she was unsure of her
own feelings. Maybe she "lied" about it in a misguided effort not
to hurt your feelings. Maybe she thought you would have taken it
badly had she told you that "studying" with you is not the same
as "studying" with J and didn't want to confront you.
It
Takes Awhile to Get Over Someone
There is no magical way
to get over someone that you have cared for. One theory that I have
heard is that it takes half the time a relationship lasted to get
over it, and many times you cannot totally get "over" a loved one.
But time heals, and focussing your emotions and attentions on other
people and other activities (like college and studying with friends)
certainly will help too.
K
May Still Be a Nice Person, and There are Others Too
If you do put K in a
good light, and believe that she didn't mean to hurt you or "lie"
to demean you, then she probably is still a nice person.
And there probably are
other nice women out there who will feel for you over the long term
the same feelings that you can share with them, and they won't turn
bad on you.
Lefty
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