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Dear Lovesick,
Ah. This is a toughie.
No one wants to be the
first to say those precious three words. What if he doesn't feel
the same way? What if he does? Why won't he just say it?
Guess what...guys are
notoriously slow to declare their affection.
He's
Normal
To a woman, a
declaration of love generally means that you enjoy this person and
would like to continue sharing time together.
To a man, a declaration
of love is just one slippery step before marriage. It scares them.
Therefore, if your man is slow to say those words, rest assured
there is nothing wrong with either of you.
Generally the only men
who are quick to declare their undying love are those who are using
it as a ploy to get you into bed with them. DON'T FALL FOR IT!!
You say that your man
shows you that he loves you but just doesn't say the words. I would
be curious to know how he shows his love.
Look within yourself.
Are these demonstrations of his love enough for you to know his
feelings? If so, don't push it. He'll get there when he's ready.
However, if his inability
to "say the words" is causing you to doubt his true feelings for
you and you feel a pressure (internal or otherwise) to know for
sure, you have two choices:
First option
Just say it. Chances
are, he will say it back. It is almost an automatic response. Watch
him. Does he respond immediately or does he seem uncomfortable and
unsure? Your answer, once again will be in the nonverbal signs.
 Mature
option:
Second option, at some
nonromantic time, ask him how he feels about you and where he sees
your relationship as going. This is the more mature of the options
but it is definitely much more difficult. Use your own insecurity
as an excuse. Tell him honestly, "I've been kind of obsessing lately
about the fact that we have not spoken of love yet in our relationship
and I sort of feel as if we should have. I care deeply about you
and I guess I am wondering how you feel about me.."
That should hit the ball
squarely into his court.
Good luck. Jody
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