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Dear Madeline,
This guy clearly intrigues
you. You seem a bit uncomfortable about the difference in power
that you two have due to your being his student.
I agree that this can
be a problem as I have said in an answer
to a confused damsel, several months ago.
Your situation is nice,
though, because you are soon to be out of his class. Then, you can
go to his office hours, or call him, and suggest a more social meeting.
College professors love
to go out and have coffee with former students. (I know because
my wife, my father, and my brother are all college professors!)
I think in that more neutral setting you will see for yourself if
he is really interested in you.
You can ask personal
questions, "Are you married?" "What kinds of relationships have
you had with African American people in the past?" I think it's
wonderful that you are attracted to this man, and you seem to be
in a good place in your life to meet people.
Take it slow, make sure
he meets your needs for clarity and communication. Also, how much
is the racial difference an issue for you? The conversation about
this issue can really exciting and illuminating for both of you,
I would think.
Good luck!
Love,
Charlie
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