Dear King Bitter,

Once again, I can relate.

What good is a relationship for? Its a big pain in the *bleep* if you think about it. Other than sex what is it worth?

I'll wind up being entirely dependent on a person who won't understand me or who'll just hurt me or limit me, so what's the problem? The problem is us.

Its not like I've done a 360 and decided that relationships are great and that I want to get into one right away, but I'm aware enough to realize that those are most of my insecurities and my cynicism speaking. Relationships aren't complete wastes of time, not always.

The big difference between you and him is HIS anger, and his anger is what concerns me.

You have problems with depression....ding ding...me too.

You're cynical....ding ding...so am I.

You're afraid to open up....ding ding...that's me

and you give dumb excuses about not wanting to fall in love...ding ding...

and what have we won? A life of self delusion and pain and loneliness.

It's all good to know what you want. You want to be wealthy and successful, which is good. And it seems like you're going to get there despite all of the people who've hurt you over the years, but you have a lot of hostility inside (so do I).

We have to think about what is making us so damned bitter inside and so afraid of "opening up" when there's really nothing to lose. And you're so overly cynical. You wrote about this and said that you get angry when the subject is mentioned, therefore you really DO care and you really KNOW that there is a PROBLEM. But you're kind of on the right track.

I agree. He shouldn't think about relationships, he doesn't sound safe enough.

Don't worry about relationships if you're not ready for one I know this will sound all cutesy and disgusting to a guy like you, but you have to get to know yourself to start feeling better and less depressed, less cynical and more happy.

I think that you could use a little counseling (so do I), as the tone in your letter leads me to believe that this is not the only personal conflict that you have.

As for your question about people ruling your life...you're not letting them rule your life, your letting your anger rule your life, which is an EMOTION, Mr. hates-cutesy-wutesy.

So, the logical thing is to do is whatever it takes to feel calm, happy and relaxed.

Unhappy is right. A life without intimacy is bad.

If you think this is too corny for you, then prepare yourself to revel in all of your millions and millions of dollars unhappy....very unhappy.

I hope that you do okay

Jayne