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Welcome to the wonderful
world of dating.
You have just embarked
on a roller coaster ride that is more confusing than finding Waldo.
It's a jungle out there and we are all just trying to survive.
OK, now that I am done
being the welcome wagon, on to your question.
Long-Distance
Doesn't Work
First of all I would
like to point out a fact that I will stick to until the day I die
that fact being: Long distance relationships do NOT (I repeat NOT)
work out (there are a few exceptions but they are very rare and
have a lot of time invested before the distance). OK let's start
from the top of your letter and work our way down.
You
Might be Missing Great Opportunities
You say that you are
inexperienced in relationships, yet you do not date anyone that
asks you out. Why why why? Don't get me wrong, it's good that you
are waiting for the right guy to come along. The only problem I
see with this theory is that while you are waiting for prince charming
to ride in on his white horse you're missing out on Joe next door
who could just well be a great guy, a great friend and a great boyfriend.
Now I am not saying date EVERY guy you have ask you out, just give
some a try. You might surprise yourself.
But that's not the point
of the letter so lets get to it.
Everything that you said
about your boyfriend just seems so negative. Are you really happy
with him or what he does for you? I think you should reevaluate
the relationship. I couldn't find one nice thing that you said about
your boyfriend.
Another thing is that
it sounds like you have idealized the perfect boyfriend and Sam
isn't measuring up. No one can ever live up to standards, so try
compromising. It sounds to me like you should just cut your losses
and look for someone more local.
OK now the question:
Is his behavior typical?
Well there is no set
thing that guys do to show that they care. Each has his own special
little way of letting his girlfriend know that he cares. Just because
he doesn't open doors or he makes you pay half doesn't mean that
he doesn't care.
It sounds like he is
trying to protect himself. He got hurt by his last girlfriend and
he's trying to not let that happen again so he isn't being his normal
self. Maybe he isn't the type to always dole out the compliments.
He
Might Care
Fear not. Just because
he doesn't do the sweet things he used to does not mean he doesn't
care.
My boyfriend was Mr.
Romance in the flesh when he was courting me. Once we began a relationship
the super sweet things began to die down. Now he will occasionally
open doors for me (like when I refuse to get out of the car) and
I don't receive the good morning emails like I used to. But he still
cares and I know he does by the way he acts around me. He just is
comfortable in our relationship (we just celebrated our 5 month
anniversary a few days ago). With you having a long distance relationship
though, it's hard to tell.
Take some time out and
try and figure out if you are happy. If you aren't then let him
go. It's not easy but there's someone out there for you.
Good luck =)
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