Dear DLJ:

The point is, she shouldn't be focusing on what others want.

Let's clear one thing up right away: No matter what you decide, you're probably going to end up feeling guilty. Modern science is not yet advanced enough to clone human beings, so you will not be able to be everywhere at once.

Don't Be Resentful

Let's clear another thing up right away: You should NEVER be resentful at being given the opportunity to enjoy yourself with people that matter to you. Fun is a precious commodity that should be protected at all costs.

OK, now that we've gotten that out of the way, let's move on.

Grovel If You Have To

Contrary to popular belief, most employers are human. Some of them even have families. The worst that could happen if you ask for more time off in July for the reunion is that you'd get fired. Then you'd have plenty of time to go to the reunion, wouldn't you?

All kidding aside. If you're smart and your boss is reasonable, it won't happen that way. Offer to work overtime...nights, weekends, whatever...to make up the time you're missing. Grovel. Offer to wash your supervisor's car. Offer to wash your supervisor's dog.

I agree, she has to think creatively.

Basically, if you really want to go to the reunion, you'll find a way to make it happen. If you don't really want to go, you'll find a way to make excuses. (Something like "I don't want to ask for the time off.")

Talk to Your Boyfriend

At the beginning of your letter, you mentioned that you are happy with your boyfriend but feel that he is becoming "more self-absorbed and impulsive." Have you talked to him about it? If it's important enough to tell me, it's certainly important enough to tell him.

I hope that, as I am writing this, you are having the time of your life with your boyfriend and his brother in Oregon.

– Mo