|
Dear Utterly Confused,
Let me clear up your
confusion:
- Don't speak to her
any more.
- Don't see her any
more.
It'll
Be Difficult
It'll be difficult for
a bit, but you'll recover, and I bet you'll end up finding a good
female friend eventually who will appreciate you for the loving,
caring, selfless person you seem to be, and she'll want to be in
a committed relationship with you.
It's
Not Healthy
Jennifer DID use you
-- as a crutch, a shoulder to cry on, whatever you want to call
it -- she took advantage of you. I'm not saying this is typical,
or that only women do this to men. It happens both ways. The point
is, it's not healthy, it's not right, and no one deserves it.
Her
Alcoholism
There were a couple of
red flags in your letter, too, which clarified things for me. Namely,
the jealousy and the alcohol factor. If she was only able to truly
show her emotions when she'd been drinking, she's got issues to
deal with that would be best addressed in the care of a professional
therapist and an alcoholism treatment program.
Her
Jealousy is a Problem
And jealousy feeds off
other jealousy. I have a feeling that if you were with a woman who
wasn't insanely jealous of you seeing platonic female friends, you
wouldn't freak out over her hanging out with male friends.
 I'm
Also Too Nice
So call this a lesson
learned, take some space and time, and be yourself. If you're really
as nice as you say (I have the same syndrome), you will find your
intended and be happy. Don't stress over it -- you're still young.
-- Mensch
|
