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Dear Confused,
The Bible Forbids Premarital Sex
First of all, I do believe that oral sex is within the confines
of "sex" in general, and that the Bible forbids it before
marriage.
Refrain from All Forms of Lust
Going even further, the Bible says that we are to abstain from
lust (sinful desires) altogether, no matter what the form (1
Thess 4:3-5).
Don't Even Think About It
Jesus himself said that He looks at the conditions of our heart
more than the actual acts that we do, so He condemned the very thought
of sexual immorality, even if it hasn't been acted out.
For example, Jesus said "You have heard that it was said to
those of old, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I say to you
that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed
adultery with her in his heart" (Matt
5:28).
As a Catholic...
Since your boyfriend is Catholic and believes in the Bible as God's
Word, these are the commandments he has chosen to live under.
(You might also review Rom 13:13 and James 1:14-15 for more insight
on the Biblical view of lust.)
He Cares for You So Much, He Abstains
Instead of feeling unattractive and rejected by your boyfriend's
desire to wait and keep your relationship pure, try thinking of
it this way: he cares for you so much that he wants to do this the
right way. He doesn't want to give in to momentary desire and regret
it later. He respects the sanctity of marriage and the sexual union
between man and wife so much that he is willing to take the hard
road to guard that gift between the two of you.
His Self-Control May Endure Other Temptations
Perhaps this also points to his integrity because he is acting
out what he says he believes in. He is exhibiting self-control,
and wants to keep your relationship pure. If he was willing to give
in to his convictions, could you then trust him to keep your relationship
pure in other ways?
Would you have 100% confidence in his ability to control his desires
when faced with other temptations?
Some food for thought...
-- Hope
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