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"Kwan is having
a hard time trusting me..."
-EmperorKwan
"Duh."
-Jayne
 Jayne's
Instant Love and Learn Letter Answerer:
Hi, this is Jayne. I'm unavailable right now because my brain just
leaked out of my head and onto the keyboard reading this long, unnecessary,
trite letter.
If you're a selfish little
girl who often finds herself "stuck between two relationships
" and "not knowing what to do" then please leave
your message after the beep.
If you believe that you
were sent this message in error please step away from your computer,
gain a conscience, and try again.
:::beep:::
Hiyeee!
My name is ummm...(what
is it again? oh yeah...)
"EMPERORKWAN".
Right that's it... I think...Well anyway I'm a shallow money grubbing
morally devoid person who spends too much time manipulating men
and writing long emails about my jacked up life when I should
be sending this as a script to "As The World Turns."
I've figured out what
to do about my dear Kwan, I'll do him a favor and let him find
a normal girl who loves him for him instead of trying to use him.
Golly, its not that the problem is regaining his trust, its about
me gaining self worth and a real personality! But that won't be
happening anytime soon so...LOL.
I will also allow
"Don Carlos'" to purchase me for a suitable price and
become his slut wife until he dumps me for someone younger and
prettier a few years later.
And Amber... well golly
she's my best friend! As a true bitch, I'll need a back up bitch
to "have my back." You know, sleep with my "love"
interests and play phone and email tag (not to mention play with
my emotions!) all just for fun. Boys come and go, but best friends...well
gee they last forever!
So I guess life is
not bad after all! Phew! I'm gonna finish up KSU and get my bachelors
in "Useless Trophy Wife-ology" with a strong concentration
in "Gold Digging". GO KSU!!!!!!!!
Thanks for your help
anyway everyone...
yours truly
Bubble Head.
(OOPS! damn it!)
I mean,
EMPERORKWAN
(yeah, that's it...I think...)
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I
agree with all of it! I'm rolling on the floor laughing. That's
all I can say.
– Sam |
:::beep:::
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