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Reader Emily Responds:
This is ridiculous.
Sexist Expectations Are To Blame
It is terrible that women are force-fed sexist expectations
of their sexuality, and it accounts for many many women
having low self-esteem.
If this particular woman felt that her self-worth was
defined by her physical appearance, she is not alone, nor
should she be blamed for feeling hurt.
He's Worsening the Negative Images
Jeannie wrote that "The underlying issue was hers
to deal with, and his actions became what she reacted to
instead." Absolutely not! Her husband is contributing
to, and worsening, the negative images about women which
made her insecure in the first place. I'm sorry, but he
gets no justification for this one. It is his problem, and
not hers. His actions indicate his attitudes towards all
women, and he should go about trying to become more conscientious
in his actions rather than excusing them or trying to make
compromises or amends.
No woman is to blame for reacting strongly towards sexist
actions like this; often, the trouble is we don't act strongly
enough.
– Emily
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