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Hi,
You need a therapist.
You
Have Both Been Beaten Up
The "beatings"
you felt, she probably felt as well. In that case, you both are
at a point where you have a mixture of feelings: love, desire, neediness,
wariness, fear, anger, resentment. In
my opinion, the safest way to get through all of these complex feelings
is to use a professional guide.
These are big issues.
You've discussed marriage, you've gotten your families involved.
Even if you were to decide to be together, there would always be
a host of big things you would need to work out. So, unless you
just want to break it off, which it sounds like you don't, then
see her with some guidance.
Forget the Past and Live in the Moment
Also, when not in the
therapist's office, try to not talk about your relationship too
much. Try to be together in the moment with each other. All of the
past conflicts and issues are gone, in the past. Now is where you
two should come together and see if the moment is real.
Sort
Your Baggage
It is possible that you
are still living in the memory of what might have been. Or, it is
also possible that you are great in the moment and that the other
stuff is just baggage that needs sorting out.
Good luck!
Charlie
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