I'm a 25 year old virgin. (Yes, I know.) I've done everything else except have sex. There have been opportunities and temptation, but it's very important for me to wait until marriage.

Sex Grosses Me Out

While I do believe in God, that isn't the main reason I don't want to do "it." Mostly, the idea of sex grosses me out when I think of my boyfriend "with" some other girl. You never really know for sure who has slept with whom, with what protection, and all that the other people down the line, etc. It doesn't have to do with trust. It's just that my boyfriend wouldn't 100% know either.

I'm Not Jealous

I'm not a jealous person, but the image of someone I'm dating having sex with someone else turns my stomach. Getting STDs are a concern, but not even what I think of first.

We're Not Serious

My current boyfriend is not someone I can see myself with in the long run, NOT because of the sex issue. We're having a good time, but it's nothing serious. I don't see it becoming more. I've told him that I won't sleep with him, although his other girlfriends have. He understands and respects that.

Sometimes when we're making out, I get really turned off thinking about him and any other girls before me. I wonder how I compare, and if all his actions and touches have been done before to others. Is that the virgin complex? Then, I hate myself and feel dirty for letting things go pretty far when it's not even the farthest he's gone.

Then, I feel undesirable and unattractive because he can definitely control himself around me. Obviously, he couldn't do it in the past.

Yes, I'm terrible. I want it both ways.

I just hate the image of someone I'm intimate with having sex with someone else. I wish I didn't think about it, and I sincerely try not to because it makes me feel sick, but I can't help it.

I don't want to care, but I do.

I Want To Marry a Virgin

My ideal would be to marry a virgin. I don't need someone pure, just someone who has waited his life for that one special person who will be there forever.

Am I really hard and judgmental for anyone I might meet, and unrealistic for nowadays?