Dear Panel,

I've been going out with my girlfriend, Lisa, for a little over 2 months now. from the first date she was the agressor, physically – she was much more experienced, but still a virgin. (and plans on staying one till marriage )

I Am a Virgin, But Open to Sex

I'm a virgin too, open to sex, but a lot less experienced than her. I was pretty shy from the start, and she didn't hesitate then to be very physical, heavy petting and all that, and now that I'm less innocent and dancing the dance with her, she's pulling back. For our last 4 or 5 dates she's really spaced herself from me. shaking a finger (kind of saying "None of that..." ) to any physical advance I make.

We've talked and she says that she just wants to take a step back now, and slow down. It's just like, "why teach someone all the moves if you don't wanna do the dance?" It's really hurting me, how she's putting space between us.

I'm Not in a Rush To Have Sex

It's not sex that I want, I'm really not in any rush to have sex, but she seems to think every little kiss and touch will lead to us having sex, and so she's really pushing me away. We hold hands and occasionally give a quick peck now.

I don’t want sex, but I want the passion that was there before, And I want this barrier she's put up between us to come down.

What should I do? Please help.

– Talon

Male, age 17, California, USA

 

Alicia, Jody, Charlie, Shane, and Shyann answer this question.