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Tony –
After reading your email, you had my mind racing – what kind
of a guy is this? What does he want? Does he really like this girl?
What the heck is he afraid of?
No Wonder You Never Had a Girlfriend
OK, you say you never had a girlfriend, and you're not sure why.
I'll tell you why; you say:
"I believe a guy shouldn't speak to a girl unless he's sincerely
interested in her; unless the guy is 100% absolutely sure there
will not be any sort of emotion going on during the conversation."
HELLO??? Wake up there, Tony – if ALL guys did this, guys
and girls would NEVER talk! You need to loosen up and put yourself
out there in the dating world – talk to ALL sorts of people
WITHOUT any expectations. Then you'll meet more people. I mean how
can you tell by looking at someone if there is going to be some
kind of emotional relationship? The answer to this may surprise
you.
You're Being Superficial
Now onto your girl dilemma: you say that this girl is beautiful
and you like her more and more each day, BUT you have NEVER talked
to her! How can you like her more and more? You don't even know
what kind of person she is! She are being superficial and looking
at her from the outside only – it's unfair to judge her this
way.
If you WANT to REALLY get to know her, TALK to her! She is not
going to bite! Try to spark up a conversation if you want to get
to know her. Saying "hi...what's up?" is a simple enough start.
You're a Control Freak
Something in your email REALLY disturbed me: you wrote, "if I manage
to get to talk to her and even become her friend. Will I be able
to control the relationship?"
WHAT? Control the relationship? Excuse me BUT why would you want
to control someone? She SHOULDN'T be controlled – and you shouldn't
want to control her!
For that reason alone she wouldn't want to go out with you. (And
I wouldn't blame her!) Trust me, girls don't want to feel owned
and controlled.
You're Wasting Time by Stalling
Anyway, after all that, if you really want to talk to her DO it
already – you're just wasting time by stalling.
Good luck (to her and to you)
– Jassy
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