Dear Panel,

I am a 27 year old male in the UK who is married and is expecting his first child early next year. I occasionally have depressive episodes.

Main Person: She is a 22 year old student who lives abroad, with whom I am hopelessly in love.

The Other Person: My wife of one year and my partner of seven years.

We Married Because It Was the Natural Thing To Do

Okay, well, I have been with the woman who is now my wife for seven years, and we got on wonderfully well initially, as one always does. We met at Universities, and then both finished at the same time and got jobs in the same area, so we moved in together and it felt the most natural thing in the world. We now have a house together and we have been through some rough times in the last seven years, but we got married last year because it was the next logical step and we both wanted a family.

I Met a Girl on the Internet

Then online earlier this year, I met a girl on the Internet, and we clicked straight away. Although we are VERY different people, we think alike, we laugh at the same things and we are compatible sexually.

My Wife Is Like a Sister

My wife an I have always been OK sexually, but I am a lot more 'adventurous' than she is, and there are a lot of things which she simply will not do or even consider in bed. I feel now that my wife is more like a sister to me and that my true love is my Internet lover.

We both want to be together, but the problem is not only that I am married, but that my wife is now pregnant. And whilst I am overjoyed at the idea of being a Dad, I feel trapped in the wrong life and I know that my ultimate happiness lies with living with my newfound soulmate in her country. She understands me, loves me and we both want the same things in life, and sexually.

I know it's a mess, but it seems to be a straight choice between denying my true feelings and chance of happiness, or settling for sticking with 'second best' because of the baby. I really need some advice.

How do I choose between loyalty to my wife & unborn child, or a future with my Internet lover ?

KP, Patra, Jimmy, Brad & Heather, and Mr. Survivor answer this question.