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Dear Sarah,
Talk to him!
You need to ask him, no matter how uncomfortable or awkward the
situation will be for both of you. You have no way of justifying
what you suspect until you do.
Fantasy Is Just Fantasy
After all, would your boyfriend's asking you to dress up as his
schoolteacher mean that he's necessarily harboring a latent desire
to have sex with his calculus teacher? No.
Are most people who engage in S&M inherently violent, brutal
people? Of course not.
Does a woman indulging in a rape fantasy with her husband actually
*want* to be viciously raped by a criminal? Ridiculous!
My point is, fantasy is more often than not just that, and if this
is really a concern to you, then you need to bring it up with your
boyfriend. Case closed. Relationships without open communication
are not successful relationships.
Don't Do It If You're Uncomfortable
It is perfectly fine and totally up to you to participate or not
participate in role-playing. If it makes you uncomfortable, don't
do it. I don't think anyone will object to that statement. But give
your boyfriend the benefit of the doubt first before you convict
him.
Ask him, and if he does admit that he's lusted after a little
girl or two in his time, THEN you can talk about counseling.
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