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Dear Confused in TX,
I thought plots this convoluted and bizarre only existed in the
soap operas I don't watch. It's really unfortunate that there are
actually people with such ugly personalities in the world, but of
course we've seen much worse
from the human race this month.
Put Everything in Perspective
Thus, my first bit of advice is, put everything in perspective.
As despicable as your MIL's actions are, accept that they have occurred
and prevent them from happening in the future by doing a couple
of things:
1. Change the friggin' password on your voicemail.
2. Stop snooping in other people's property. They asked you to
feed their cats to their fish (or something like that), not to go
through their desk. You do realize how ridiculous it is for you
to complain about her invading your privacy when you are guilty
of precisely the same?
Make Peace with Her...
We have also seen much better aspects of human existence in recent
days. Why don't you join the throngs of decent, peace-seeking individuals
on this planet, offer your MIL a peace pipe (figuratively speaking,
unless she's into that sort of thing literally), and see what happens.
You might find this has all been a terrible, sad misunderstanding
based on lack of communication (to all my fans: You didn't think
I'd forget to get the C-word in there somehow, did you?).
...Unless She Just Hates You
On the other hand, it's also possible that you'll discover that
your MIL is a horrible old hag who hates your guts, and that your
husband was perfectly justified in breaking off contact with her,
in which case you should forget she ever existed and move on with
your life.
I've referred repeatedly to the mother; naturally my advice relates
to the sister as well.
Pass These Lessons to Your Children
You got married very young, but have stayed together for a while.
I hope your relationship is strong and will continue to be so, and
I trust that you will learn lessons from these incidents and pass
along the right messages to your own children.
All the best,
– Mensch
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