Dear Panel,
I am 31 and have been a 'serial monogamist'
for most of my life. I'm pretty outgoing and have had a relatively
successful career in technology.
He's 40 years old and a high school English
teacher. He's had 6 - 7 relationships, but has spent the majority
of his adult life single.
We've been dating for two years and enjoy many
similar interests, values and culture.
He's a wonderfully kind and deep person, but
our last year has been pretty rocky. He thinks that I want
to change him since I've tried to give him some assistance
in how to dress better, socialize, have better manners
in general be more refined.
As a result, he says that he doesn't feel good
about himself around me and I end up holding back on my opinions.
Can this relationship work out for the long
term, or are we too different?
Female, age 31, Oakland CA
Aaron,
Gillian,
Jeannie,
Luka,
Stephanie,
and Vivi answer this question.