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Reader magenta
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Why do I focus on shallow, materialistic 'nit-picks?

Jeannie said:

You have no right to expect HIM to change to suit YOUR needs and your feelings.

Reader Magenta Responds:

I disagree, because I think Charlie's right here. He's a guy after all!

I thought my boyfriend wasn't cute enough, had an ugly haircut, had ugly clothes, didn't take me out enough, never brought me flowers, wasn't interested in anything relevant to me (the list goes on and on).

But I was wrong!

All I Had To Do Was Ask

All I had to do was ask – and all he needed was a new haircut and the understanding that if he likes it when I put something nice on, then he should wear something nice too.

The secret is to have this conversation in a non-offensive way. For example, don't say 'your clothes suck, let's go shopping.'

Magenta

Female, age 21, USA

 

 

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