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Virginia,
Being Scared Is Understandable
The way you are feeling is perfectly understandable. You obviously
love your boyfriend very much, and you're scared of the pain that
losing him would cause you. You see his ex as a potential threat
to your relationship.
Talk to Him About His Feelings
The best thing to do in this circumstance is to talk to your boyfriend.
You need to let him know that you love him very much, and that you
don't want to lose him. You need to find out how he feels about
his ex.
Having Feelings Dosn't Mean He'll Act on Them
They were together for five years, so it's likely that he'll always
have feelings for her. But that doesn't mean that he'll act on them.
Chances are, when you talk to him, he'll reassure you that he loves
you, and that he doesn't want anything to come in between you two.
The fact that he has refused to meet with his ex tells me that he
values your relationship and that he's concerned with how you feel.
As in any relationship, communication is the key.
Talk to him, get on the same page, and you'll feel a lot better
about the whole process.
– Aaron
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