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Hello Virginia!
Wow...what a frustrating situation.
I can only start by saying that it seems like you care a lot about
your boyfriend and that it seems he cares for you, too. In a short
time, it appears that you have developed an intense relationship.
An important thing to consider is that when someone is in a relationship
for a long time, they for some reason have chosen to be together
for that length of time. Sometimes it is love, sometimes it is just
easy to stay together.
If they had broken up mutually, it would be easier to assess.
He Still Has Feelings for Her
But since he seems to have gotten his heart broken by her, I would
imagine that he still has feelings for her whether he says it or
not. It is hard to be with someone for a long time and not continue
to care about them. I know he says it was infatuation, but he still
has feelings for her I'm sure.
Perhaps it wasn't a good idea for him to get involved with someone
else so quickly after the break-up, but he did and now your feelings
are involved.
Let Him See Her
Here's what I think: You need to step back and let him figure out
how he feels. I think you should let him see his ex-girlfriend.
He needs to be around her and realize whether he still loves her
or not. The only way he can do that is by seeing her.
If he chooses to be with his ex, at least you didn't get strung
along for months and years waiting to be dumped.
If he chooses to be with you, then you know that he has had a fair
chance to make his decision and finally break with his ex.
You Deserve Someone Who Loves You
Either way, you are young and still have a chance to meet another
great guy. I know that it is hard to imagine that there are tons
of great men out there who would love to date you, but you ALWAYS
deserve someone who loves you and only you and IS ABSOLUTELY SURE
about that.
Give him time and space, even though it may hurt you. If you think
this is a long term relationship, let him figure out who is he and
who he wants to REALLY be with!
Pretend To Be Confident
Good luck and be confident. Even if you aren't, PRETEND!
Kalia
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