Dear Panel,
I am a 24-year-old female, 1st grade teacher,
and I have always been insecure when it comes to love.
He is 33 years old, my fiancee as of last week. He is
a hard working engineer who is romantic, sincere, and
loving (not to mention easy going). When he proposed
he cried, it was so amazing.
We Met Online
We met on a Christian matchmaker site
three years ago. We had a blind date and hit it off.
The first year of our relationship was a bit rocky.
I found out that he was going on other dates or chatting
online to other girls. He wanted to make sure that I
was the one for him but did not want to hurt me by letting
me know he was testing the waters.
I Gave Him An Ultimatum
Well two years ago come March I had it
out with him. I told him it was either he give me his
all or we we are through. An ultimatum I know, but I
couldn't stand being one of many dates in his life.
Well he chose me and we got engaged for our third year
anniversary. We set the date for July 27, 2002.
We Live Together, But I Want to
Move Out
The problem is this, I love him to death
and I know that he feels the same way. We have been
sharing his house (different bedrooms, not sleeping
together, hey, we are both strong Catholics) for almost
two years now. I told him that when we got engaged I
wanted to move back into my parents house to have a
newness to the situation when we get married!
On Saturday he was online and someone
started chatting with him and it freaked me out. It
brought back a rush of feelings of distrust and jealously
and hurt that I thought I had buried.
I talked to him about it and he said we
can work through this together, that he will do what
it takes to gain my trust, even not chatting. I feel
like I do not want to move back home because of this,
I want to be around him. When he gets bored he stays
on the computer for hours.
I Want To Bury the Hatchet
I know it is not healthy to carry these
feelings about my future husband so my real question
is this. How do I bury the hatchet so I can move on
and have a healthy relationship with him? I love him
to death and cannot imagine life without him. Please
help me get past this issue. Thank you so much.
Female, age 24, USA
Jimmy,
KP,
and Brad &
Heather,
answer this question.
