Answers:

Dear Susie,

You Never Had His Respect

Oy, oy, oy, oy, oy!!!! NO ONE can regain respect one never had! Don't take that personally, please. A man like that has no respect for anyone, including himself. He is playing ego, conquering games, and is DEFINITELY not someone you should want in your life for an INSTANT of your time!

You Have Low Self-Esteem

I hate to sound like a broken record, but, as I have said before to other ladies in similar boats, this, is a problem of you not having enough self-esteem. To have wasted as much time, energy and affection as you have on this person you must have really low self-esteem. I will not lower myself to call him a man. Spoiled, egotistical brat does, however, come to mind.

Develop Yourself

PLEASE develop your own abilities, interests, and self-love. What is the best you aspire to be? Did you finish college? Are you working hard to become the best person you can be? To do what you've always wanted to do? Do you participate in church/temple, literary, writing, amateur theater group(s)? Do you bowl, ride, skate, run, do something physical and cathartic? Do you do charitable works, spend time doing loving things for the needy?

Stop The Fantasy

I agree. She has to stop the fairy tale delusion.

Think about moving in the kinds of circles where you are appreciated and understood, instead of living in a fantasy world where your prince will gallop to you over 2000 miles and take you to his castle.

This is the REAL world honey - and it will never happen, until you care enough about yourself not to subject yourself to the emotional abuse of this kind of man.

Worry about your self respect, not that of this user/loser. Whatever his reasons for his behavior, you are not a loving woman to him, but just someone he can use to suit his own twisted sense of importance.

There Are a Few Good Men Out There

There ARE good men out there, albeit few and far between, but you will never find one until you are sure you like yourself, and put yourself in physical and emotional situations to meet the right kind of men, and women.

Good luck. You have the potential to become the best you can be, and when you do, you will laugh ruefully at the waste of time and energy you have spent worrying about what this NUDNICK thinks of you. My dear, move on.

Best wishes,

- Mamala

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