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Dear Anon,
I think you show a great deal of empathy and understanding for
your girlfriend. I agree with your first statement, you shouldn't
do anything unless she's enjoying it too. It sounds like your girlfriend
was made to do things in the past that she was uncomfortable with
and you don't want to repeat old mistakes.
She Is Willing To Do It
On the other hand, if this is something that you both want to do
for you as a gift or something, and the third person knows what
she's doing (you're not forcing it on her or anything) then why
not?
Mutuality Is The Key
I think the key here is mutuality. You both should feel that you
are doing it for the right reasons and you both are enjoying yourself.
I should let it be known that I have had very little, if any, real
recreational sex. It's not that I disapprove, I just haven't really
had the opportunity. I also never wanted to damage the relationship
I was in.
Is It Worth The Risk?
I think that whenever you involve someone else sexually, you are
taking real risks with each others feelings and the trust you have
in your relationship. You have to ask yourselves, it is worth the
risks?
Also, I wonder (since you both seem very experienced) why you want
a threesome? Why are you bored in your relationship if you are still
discovering each other and what turns each of you on? I highly doubt
that having a threesome will make you closer, but again, I've never
done one.
Good luck.
- Charlie
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