Hi Ammon,

How important are those "big interests" in a relationship? Well, if they are interests like friendship, trust and love, I'd say very important. If you're speaking of bowling, tennis and music, don't worry about it.

Opposites Attract

You've probably heard the expression, opposites attract. Where it is possible that two people can find happiness together having "nothing" in common, it is not probable (and not much fun!) I think there is a happy medium here.

Your Interests Make You Special

The interests that you have are a part of what makes up the person that you
are. The same with your partner. Although you may not share all of the same interests, these interests make you the person that you are. They are special. And, they make you special.

It Would Be Boring If We All Had Common Interests

I agree. Being different gives you more to talk about.

Wouldn't it be dull if we all shared the same interests and did the same things. We wouldn't have anything to talk to each other about.

It is not always important for your partner to participate in the same activities. It is important, however, for them to show an "interest" in these activities, knowing that they are important to you.

Sometimes there are bits of interests that can be shared between partners.
For example: I'm very much into the computer, participating in Web groups like Love and Learn, creating web sites, doing digital photography, etc.

My husband only used a computer at work. Through my love of the computer and the Internet, he is now starting to surf more, learn more about web sites and who knows? He might even create one of his own someday. But, if he doesn't , that's fine too. The main thing is that he is interested in it, because it is something that he knows I enjoy. He supports me and is proud of what I've accomplished and learned.

You Can Learn New Things From Him

Sometimes, our partners can be our greatest fountain of learning. They bring to the relationship new interests and outlooks and are willing to share them in whole, or in part with us. We are then free to participate with them and share their interest or we can give them support and encouragement from the sidelines and be proud of their accomplishments.

That is as much a part of sharing a partner's interest as actually participating in it with them, and may be even more important.

Take Part In His Interests, Or Just Support Him

As you enter into your new relationship keep an open mind and heart. Be
thankful that your partner brings new ideas and interests to the table. Participate in those you really care to. When you don't care to participate, be there to support and encourage your partner, in whatever they do. THAT is what will give you a strong foundation to build a solid relationship on.

Even though you and your partner are in a relationship, you are still individuals. And, it is this individuality that makes you who you are. And, it's "who you are" that attracted your partner to you in the first place and vice-versa.

Don't forget, they may still discover common common interests.

Enjoy sharing the interests you have in common and be willing to share your partner with those interests that are his alone. Both will enrich and strengthen your relationship in their own ways.

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