Dear Frustrated,

This is a very difficult situation, because men and women often have a
completely different take on masturbation.

It's A Normal, Physical Release

Men use it as a physical release, much in the same way that a smoker has a cigarette when they have the craving. In most cases, we think of masturbating as something that is very different from having sex, and as such one can't replace the other.

The fact that he uses porn to help him along doesn't matter too much - it's simply a matter of personal preference. Either way, when men are masturbating it is simply for an easy physical release so you don't need to worry about being jealous.

Less Sex Is Normal

I don't think so. He's insulting her.

You mentioned that you weren't having as much sex as you used to, but this is perfectly normal for a couple that have been going out for nearly a year.

When people first get together the relationship is very physical (think
rabbits!), but after a while things begin to settle down. If you want more
sex from him, just let him know in no uncertain terms and I'm sure he will
be more than happy to oblige!

A big thing that you have to be careful of is making sure that he is still comfortable in telling you everything he does. Masturbation is a very personal issue with a lot of guys, and he won't tell you the truth if he thinks that you will be upset with him for it.

If You Get Upset, He'll Keep Lying

The only advice that I can give is to try not to get upset when he talks about it with you, otherwise he'll just go back to lying because he doesn't want to upset you.

Just Accept It

The best thing to do is just to accept that this will happen, and realize that you have nothing to be upset about. The more you push the issue with him the more uncomfortable he will get, so just let him know that you don't mind what he does and he'll feel better about discussing it with you.

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