Dear Hopelessly In Love,

I think you’ve got to trust what Mike says in this situation, because I think he’s being honest when he says he just wants to make sure that you two are right for each other.

Think that five years is a little too long to still not be sure? Under normal circumstances, I would say yes, but I think that you also have to take into account the fact that your relationship has been long distance for 80% of the time you’ve been together. I think it’s great that you’ve made it work, and it certainly does indicate that you two are compatible.

Distance Complicates The Issue

I agree. The distance has limited their relationship.

But even when a relationship such as yours is good, the distance complicates the issue of how good it really is.

Think about it: since you don’t have the opportunity to see each other on a daily basis, those times when you are able to see each other resemble more of a honeymoon than a routine.

You try to pack so much special stuff into those special days, that you never really shake off the newness of being together. And therein lies the problem.

You're Still In The Honeymoon Phase

A lot of relationships hit the ground running, and many are great for quite some time. But, if two people aren’t right for each other, it begins to become apparent after the honeymoon has ended, and the relationship and the people involved become a little more honest. Your honeymoon is five years old and still alive and kicking.

That's not it. He's wondering what else is out there.

I think your boyfriend recognizes this, and is rightfully hesitant about committing to marriage. After all, if he’s never experienced the routine, how well could he possibly know you?

You Need To Spend More Time Together

I hope that you two get the chance to spend a lot of time together soon, and by that, I mean months and not just a week.  

Only after you’ve gotten past all the wonderful razzle-dazzle, and gotten to know all the idiosyncrasies and even the annoyances of each other, will you be able to comfortably tell whether marriage is right for you.

For the time being, I would focus your efforts less on the destination, and more on the journey. Worry less about whether or not you’ll tie the knot, and worry more about getting to know each other.

– Shaggy