Hi Jellybean,

For starters, I think that you're very smart for thinking twice about this relationship. So many people ignore these details when they start dating and just accept them, only to have to make tougher decisions later, or just be stuck. Period.

Has He Been Treated?

So he says he's manic depressive. Has he been diagnosed? Is he on medication to control it? These are important things to know about. Some people are incorrectly diagnosed, but others need to be medicated just to live day to day normally.

Read Up On It

I would acquaint yourself with his situation and about manic depression in general. Read up on it.

It's Only Been A Month

Now about the "man of my dreams" statement. You said that you think that he "COULD" be that. Keep an open mind. He may not be your soul mate. I think you need to be with someone more than a month to come to that conclusion, so be smart.

You Should Be Concerned About Passing This On

But that's not so bad. This disease is highly treatable.

But you are also concerned about marrying him and having kids, as well you should. Not only would you be exposing yourself to a spouse and partner who has a serious mental condition, but you will also be passing that genetic material to your children.

This sounds callous, but mental illness is passed on from one generation to the next. All these factors don't necessarily "doom" you or your future children to a cruddy life, but you are wise to understand these things and use them in your decision making.

I would keep dating this man, learn more about the condition, but keep an open mind.

Decide If You Can Tolerate His Problems

Just tolerating the problem isn't good enough. She has to decide if she can love and accept him.

There are a lot of people out there with various problems. You need to pick which ones you will tolerate in your own life.

Good luck,

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