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Dear I'm an Idiot,
I feel like we have a lot in common (except that name, what's with
that?). I too, am very sarcastic, funny, beautiful and intelligent,
and if answering this question will assist one of my own, I'm on
the job.
I'm having a hard time finding the PROBLEM here, besides the fact
that he might let you do a little more asking and a little less
giving. It really sounds like the two of you have a lot going for
you, probably more than a lot of couples, and, let's face it, being
the "Cool Girlfriend" is definitely a hard-earned title.
Congrats!
Keep Communicating
You seem to have a similar sense of humor and understanding as
well, which makes communication much more easy and effective. Communication
is the key to a smooth-sailing relationship. To keep your vessel
off the rocks, keep talking.
He Sees You In His Future
The two of you also make time for each other, as well as pursuing
other interests and relationships with other people, which, ultimately,
will help you to appreciate the time you spend together. The fact
that this guy is willing to, not only continue his education, but
also remain on one coast just to be with you, says that he definitely
sees you in his future.
Better A Good Mind, Than A Good Body
I see a lot more than physical attraction, which is quintessential
in any successful relationship. Yours is especially well-found since
you met under, umm, otherwise disagreeable "long-term relationship"
guidelines. It does bother me that you refer to him as "Physically
lacking." Honey, in the long run, a good mind beats out a good
body and since you're looking for the "Happily Ever After,"
you might need to accept that Prince Charming just might wear glasses
and not have a gym membership.
I do have a feeling that this guy is more than just a frog waiting
to be kissed, since you describe an ever-growing sexual attraction.
I, myself, don't base a lot of relationships on sex. I don't think
a successful one can be. Don't get me wrong, sex is good (ok...very
good), but there's lots of more to a man than the size of his box
spring and really, that shouldn't even matter, because most of your
time should be spent enjoying his other assets.
Give To Him
If you're really looking at keeping this on for the long haul,
you may need to reevaluate how you respond to his acts of kindness.
It's great to be worshiped like the goddess you are, but a girl
can only take so much. Be sure you're also taking time to return
the favors.
It's easy to get caught up in getting what you want when he's
so willing cater to your every whim but don't let his desires go
unrequited. Don't forget that it's the little things that matter.
Enjoy The Present
So, you want to be together forever...an admirable goal, but attainable?
My advice, enjoy what your living right now and don't plan so far
ahead! Did somebody give you a deadline? Forever is a LONG time,
and who knows where this road will take you. By thinking only in
terms of "forever" and "always," gets you away
from actually setting and reaching more realistic goals.
Instead of worrying about a jinxed future, try celebrating what
you've already accomplished. You're both nearly college graduates,
you've been together for over a year. A year is a long time (not
as long as "Forever," but it's a great start).
Get Rid Of Insecurity With Positive Thoughts
Thinking that he may lose interest is a common insecurity among
any person in a relationship that has breached the six-month "I-love-every-little-thing-about-you"
phase and it's something that you can easily over come by initiating
more positive thought processes.
Focus On The Things He Loves About You
Instead of worrying about what you're doing that he might not
like, think of all the things he loves about you. Why would he change
his mind and think your assertiveness is too much? Obviously, it
those things (the little things) that drew him to you in the beginning
and will make him stay for the long stretch.
Hang in there, girl, forever will come and go before you know it,
and I'd hate to see you miss the show, while you're wondering about
the finale.
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