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Dear Mosobie,
Whatever you do, PLEASE DO NOT HAVE SEX WITH THIS LOSER.
15 Years Does Not A Woman Make
There are so many things wrong with your situation I don't
know where to begin. First of all--and I hope you don't take
offense at this, because it's a fact, not an attack--15 years
does not a woman make.
I'm not even bringing completely voluntary issues like emotional
involvement into this. The fact is that very few teenagers
have achieved any real understanding of sexual responsibility
by that age.
As an intelligent and mature woman, I know that I had at
that age realized very little of the possible consequences
that having sex can bring. Heck, I just turned 22 yesterday
and still feel scared and inexperienced a lot of the time.
Consider The Consequences
I'm not going to give you the spiel about how sex is a magical,
special thing that should only be shared by two people in
love, blah blah blah.
I don't believe that that's true, although sex can be very
emotionally fulfilling, if you choose for it to be so. That's
not what's ultimately important (about the consequences of
sex) if you're a self-assured human being.
Have you thought about what you'd do if the condom breaks,
or the Pill fails, and you end up pregnant? Have you thought
about the possibility that your boyfriend may have some scary
STD (or STDs) that is/are just waiting to be passed onto you?
Believe me, it HAPPENS. Just assume that it WILL happen to
you and then ask yourself if you're ready to deal with the
consequences. If you are, fine. But I have yet to meet a fifteen-year-old
that is.
He's An Asshole
Finally, there's the very simple point that your boyfriend
is a complete asshole.
I promise you that if you give in to his demands because
he "always gets what he wants", your relationship
will turn into one big power struggle and sex will end up
being a tool for manipulation and conflict. Any sort of demand
for sex should be a huge red flag to you indicating that he
really doesn't care about what YOU want.
So if you think over your situation long and hard and determine
that you can deal with being a pregnant teenager with AIDS
whose boyfriend becomes more abusive and tyrannical with each
act of acquiescence on your part, then by all means have sex
with your boyfriend.
If any one of those things sounds like something you'd like
to avoid, don't. You will have plenty of boyfriends in your
life and plenty of time to have sex when you're ready. It's
that simple.
Good luck,
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