Dear Jen,

Ultimately, there's not a whole lot you can do to prevent your boyfriend from proposing to you. If he wants to do it, he will.

What's important, then, is how you respond to him if and when he does. Your boyfriend seems to have a lot of trust issues and maybe not the firmest grasp on reality if his primary motivation is to keep you from seeing other guys.

He's Insecure

Explain to him that the last thing someone who is unsure of his girlfriend's love should be doing is marrying her. He needs to deal with his own insecurities and realize that the title of "Being Engaged" does not magically keep someone faithful.

Convey to him that weddings are ceremonial so there is no ticking time bomb indicating that two people in love must marry by a certain time. If you want to be together forever, and ceremony is important to you, then you have the rest of your lives to get married!

Reassure Him Of Your Love

He'll likely be very upset at your refusal, so just assure him that you care very deeply for him and promise that you will always be honest with him about where your feelings lie. LIVE that promise.

Actually, she should really be telling him what kind of proposal she wants.

Remind him that the purpose of a formal engagement is to begin preparations for a wedding, which you two cannot practically do while so separated.

Live Life While You're Apart

And maybe most importantly, don't limit yourself while you're away. I'm not telling you to be unfaithful to your boyfriend or to actively look for a new one, but keep your options open.

Seventeen really is too young for anyone living in this day and age to be getting married. That's why you've heard it so often.

Good luck,

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