Dear Pharaoh,

First of all, there is no reason why you should try and change the feelings you are having. You can't help feelings, even the really bad ones like jealousy.

Jealousy Is Natural

You've been seeing this girl for 3 months and I think it's perfectly naturally to be feeling a little over-protective of her when she looks at other guys or jokes about a foreign 'boyfriend'.

It's good that you confronted her about looking at other guys, but let's be honest - have you never looked at another girl in all the time you've been dating? Seeing someone you love check out another person can often be tough on your heart, but it's by no means a hardship, nor does it mean she loves you any less.

Have A Serious Talk About "The Italy Boyfriend"

I agree. He should tell her the jokes bother him.

I think before your girlfriend goes to Italy you should sit down with her and have a serious talk. Tell her it bothers you when she jokes about the Italian boyfriend. Make sure she understands that you do trust her, but when she jokes like that you have doubts and insecurities like any other human being.

Try and make her see it through your eyes without sounding like a control freak. Do not tell her not to see this guy, she'll only get angry. Lay everything out on the table, a good relationship is built on honesty.

She Just Wants To Be Friends With Her Ex

As for going to the beach with an ex, maybe they're just trying to be friends again. It's good that you don't want to change who she is, or be too controlling. Everyone gets jealous sometimes, so try not to over think every little detail of your relationship or you will have no fun at all!

When something bothers you, tell her in a calm, adult manner. You're both still young and dating is supposed to be fun! If you really love her, deal with your feelings by talking to her about them.

Good luck!

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