Dear Panel,

I am in love with a guy but he doesn't know me and I'm very shy.

Lefty Answers:

Well, it sounds like you're doing great for someone in a dreamworld.

Next Question

Dear Panel,

What kind of sex should we have?

Lefty Answers:

Any kind is fine with me. Shall I pick you up at 8?

Next Question

Dear Panel,

I'm looking for the meaning of the different colours of flowers. For example:

Red = passion
yellow = ... ?

I'm thinking of sending flowers to the girl I'm having a crush on, but which colour?

Lefty Answers:

What about the $9.99 mixed bouquet special at the grocery store?

Next Question

Dear Panel,

There is this really cute girl at my gym where I work out. I want to ask her out but I do not want to be one of those "jerks" who approach women at the gym.

However, I can't get her out of my head. What should I do?

Lefty Answers:

Wait for her in the parking lot.

Next Question

Dear Panel,

My daughter is a college freshman and is attracted to a guy she is friends with. She has never had a boyfriend before. Most of the students hang out as a group.

How can she let him know she is interested in him?

Lefty Answers:

Probably by talking with the guy instead of her mother.

Next Question

Dear Panel,

How do you know when he is the ONE?

Lefty Answers:

When you don't have to ask.

Next Question

Dear Panel,

How can I feel more comfortable around my boyfriend?

Lefty Answers:

Move his hand from your derrière to your waist.

Next Question

Dear Panel,

Hi, my name is Dick and me and my girlfriend broke up for two weeks and we went from seeing each other everyday day to not at all.

My question is: How come we are not making an attempt to see each other and why does it not bother me that I have not seen her in about three weeks?

Lefty Answers:

You're probably just going through a phase. It's called "moving on".

Next Question

Dear Panel,

I can't get a boyfriend because my standards are too high. What should I do?

Lefty Answers:

No problema. Just keep on looking till you get to be my age. You'll either meet the perfect guy or be just like me.

Next Question

Dear Panel,

Why does my boyfriend only want sex?

Lefty Answers:

What else do you offer him?

Next Question

Dear Panel,

How can I tell a guy that I already have a boyfriend?

Lefty Answers:

Insert the last 5 words of your question where appropriate:

"I'm kind of busy today because" <INSERT HERE>. "Tomorrow looks the same."

Next Question

Dear Panel,

Is it normal for my boyfriend to keep his eyes open while kissing?

Lefty Answers:

How did you know his eyes were open?

Next Question

Dear Panel,

I've liked my friend since 8th grade, and now we're both in 10th grade. We both flirt like crazy.

One day I asked him out, and he said "I don't know."

Why did he say that?

Lefty Answers:

I don't know.

Next Question

Dear Panel,

My boyfriend of 3 months drinks a lot during the week at work and when he comes home on the weekend I don't let him drink when he's around me.

I think it kind of bothers him when I don't let him drink. Please help me.

Lefty Answers:

I think you've got it under control. If it bothers him too much, he can spend the weekend with a bottle and you can find a non-alcoholic.

Next Question

Dear Panel,

I'm new to your site, so I hope you can help me. I have a boyfriend whom I love very much, but I don't want to get too involved with him...

So do you have any tips on how to spice up kisses and everyday life for him?

Lefty Answers:

I have some tips, but if I gave them to you he'd want to get way involved with you.

Next Question

Dear Panel,

My husband has suffered from impotence and perfomance anxiety as long asI have known him -- more than 12 years. He has this problem with all women.

My gay father says it's because he probably prefers men. What do you think?

Lefty Answers:

I think he's probably afraid of gay fathers. Why don't you both talk to a doctor instead of Dad?

Next Question

Dear Panel,

How do you break up with someone who you are deeply in love with?

The reason you are breaking up with them is because you feel that you might get hurt.

Lefty Answers:

I guess you tell them that you are so afraid of the future that you don't want to live in the present.

Next Question

Dear Panel,

Do long distance relationships ever work, and if they do- what is the secret to success?

Lefty Answers:

Sometimes they work, and the usual secret is that they become short distance.

Next Question

Dear Panel,

I sent you a "Story" question. How long does it take you to answer them?

Lefty Answers:

A lot longer than it takes to answer Snappy questions.