Dear Panel,

I am a sixteen year-old girl with a little love problem. I love my current boyfriend very much and would never even think of cheating, but he thinks that I have!

I have tried so hard to let him know I haven't, but he thinks there is something I'm holding back from him. I've tried, but cannot prove this to him.

What can I do? I'm so tired of being called a liar.

Sincerely,

– Completely Confused Kari

Female, age 16, USA

Luckily, you're right. It's just a little problem. Dump him.

Obviously he doesn't trust you – so you deserve better!

If he won't stop, you'll have to get rid of him. Perhaps he doesn't realize that you can't prove a negative. Try asking him to prove that he's never killed someone. He won't be able to.

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Dear Panel,

I have had a boyfriend but now it is over.

There are 6 guys waiting for a relationship with me, but they are all 6 so different but all so great guys, I don"t know who to choose!!

What should I do?

– LINKIN Lover from Belgium

Female, age 15, West Europe

Why choose? There's one for every day of the week, and a day of rest.

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Dear Panel,

What should I do when my boyfriend:

• • shows no interest,
• • doesn't make me feel special,
• • embarrasses me,
• • doesn't call much,
• • yells at me,
• • doesn't like for me to give him advice,
• • thinks he is right about everything, and
• • puts his friend before me?

I think I deserve someone who loves me like I love him, right?

– Concerned

Female, age 20, KC, Missouri

You should either keep pestering him, or, gosh, maybe find someone else who can return your feelings.

Yeah, you know what you deserve – get rid of the things that you don't.

If you don't know the answer to that, then you have bigger problems than your boyfriend.

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Dear Panel,

Every time I'm on the phone it's always quiet and nobody has anything to say.

Could you give me some good conversation starters?

– Speechless

Male, age 17, USA

"Hi. "
"How are you."

Or you could be like my dad, and just fill time by telling the person what you ate so far today, and what you're planning on eating. Beyond that, don't ask questions that can be answered with only "yes" or "no".

"What are you wearing?"
"So, that Ebola, it's gotta suck."
"Hey, ever try phone sex?"
"So........"

And then there's my personal favorite:
"Hi, are those really yours?"

Just hang up, okay?

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Dear Panel,

I suppose I am a little young (but old enough to know better) to ask you guys anything, but hey, what have I got to lose, right?

I am 15 years old, and I've never really had a boyfriend before. Well, I finally met someone that I think likes me, and we're good friends. He goes to a church that is right next to mine, and I invited him to our church for one Sunday, and he said he'd come.

I like him too, but I am sort of nervous.

Can you please tell me what I can do to attract him more and how not to be nervous around him? For the first time I do this, I want to make it right.

Please help! Thanks so much.

In Christ,

– Rachel W.

Female, age 15, Knoxville, Tennessee

You are not too young to ask us anything; you sound more mature than most of the questioners on this page.

I think that you've done all the right things to attract him so far. Just try to sing the hymns on key.

Just be yourself and have a good time. Remember: confidence is a turn on!

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Thank goodness that you're a busybody, or else you would have told your friend to show his balls and ask her.

Stinks being in the middle, don't it?

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Dear Panel,

I am a 26-year-old virgin. I think I am pretty with a warm and witty personality.

Why don't men want to date me? Or for the few that did, why do they not want to have sex with me? Is there something wrong with me?

It is not like I am saving myself for marriage, but I would never have sex unless I truly cared for the man.

Most men think of me as a sister figure, and if we get intimate, it ruins the friendship. I have nearly decide to be single and virgin for the rest of my life. This is very sad for me.

What is your advice?

– JB

Female, age 26, USA

It may be you. It may not. Send me a picture and I'll let you know.

You're either wearing a chastity belt or a nun's habit. Take them off, go to the bars, lose your top and VOILÀ! SEX!

There must be something you're not telling us.

A more complete answer from Aaron

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Dear Panel,

I recently found out my boyfriend (40 years old) has been using drugs. After I learned of this I told him if he got help I would stay with him and support him in his fight.

As it turned out, I had to call his probation officer and tell what was going on because he was out of control. Now he is in rehab and wants me to come to a counseling session.

I'm so angry with his behavior, the loss of work from no transportation, him coming to my work high and out of control threatening my job and etc.etc. The list goes on.

He has never once hit me or taken anything out of my house, however my car, letting other people drive it and etc.

My emotions are very mixed at this time and I don't know if I can live with someone who uses drugs for the sake of them using again.

On the other hand, as a Christian woman, I am supposed to be forgiving and trust in the Lord.

Right now I guess I'm just angry. Help!

– Emotional

Female, age 43, Grand Rapids, Michigan

I'd stay angry.

Knowing what you're "supposed" to do only works to make you feel guilty in this case. I say, go to counseling with him, see what develops. You don't owe him a thing: do what's right for you. God will understand.

Listen, you don't have to take that crap. Live your own life.

Run – do not walk – away from this man.

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Dear Panel,

My friend is jaloes that I can have so many guys.

She thinks that no one wants her because she's a redhead and she'll never have a serious relationship. They always use her for one night and then dump her the next day, I feel so sad for her.

What should I do too make her feel better and comfort her?

– Saar

Female, age 15, West Europe Belgium

Just be her friend and help her to have self-confidence.

Two possibilities:

1. She's a prostitute with low self esteem –Tell her she doesn't need those types of guys and that she is special. Try to help her find better guys.
   
   
2. Her jealousy makes you feel better about yourself –YOU have the low self esteem and you should learn to be a better friend and not boast when a friend is down. She is probably prettier then you and more talented anyway.

Also it's "jealous", not "jaloes".

Share your guys.

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Dear Panel,

I am currently dating a 15-year-old and I am 19 years of age, and we are both females. Is this illegal for the state law of PA?

Her mother just found out, and said it was OK with her to date each other just as long as nothing really sexual is happening. So if she has no evidence of sexual behavior can she still press charges?

Thank You

– Kristeena

Female, age 19, PA

In Pennsylvania, dating is OK – but if you have sex with someone under 16 and you're a four years older, it counts as a felony in the second degree. Gender doesn't matter.

It's frivolous for ANYONE to press charges for ANY criminal offense if there is no evidence.

Are there no boys available in PA?

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Dear Panel,

The Age of Consent in New York is 17, but the law states this by saying that no one 21 or older can have sexual relations with someone 17 or younger.

What if a 17-year-old has sex with a 15-year-old? Or an 18-year-old with a 15 year old?

Thanks.

– Dazed & Confused

Male, age 17, New York, NY USA

Because you are younger than 21, it would not be considered statutory rape.

It would be sexual misconduct, which is a Class A Misdemeanor (up to 1 year in jail or $1000 fine).

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In California, it is a misdemeanor once YOU turn 18.

But becoming an 18-year-old father who must pay child support may be the harshest penalty, if you don't control yourself.

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Dear Panel,

I have an unusual question, but was hoping I could get some feedback from woman who'll know a lot more than me!

I want to propose to my girlfriend and obviously I'd like to get a nice ring for her.
The problem is she is allergic to most metals and doesn't ever wear rings. I think she could wear platinum but I don't know what kind of ring she'd like as I have never seen her wear one.

I have limited money so it would be a bit of a disaster if I got her a ring she didn't like. So I figured I'd have to propose without a ring. But I'd like to think that me proposing to her would be an occasion she'd like to remember (!) and I wouldn't want to ruin it or make her think I'd just thought of the idea and hadn't given it proper thought.

What should I do?

– Jason

Male, England

I'd give her a paper ring with a poem inside it, and a promise to get her the ring of her desires. But maybe a woman would tell you something else.

Why don't you start your own tradition? Buy her something she likes, and propose to her that way (stuffed animals etc.) and tell her you are doing your own special kind of proposal.

Propose with no ring, then go shopping for rings together.

From our resident jeweler:

You can give her what's called a "Promise Ring." It is a small token of your affection, relatively inexpensive. Tell her you want her to select the style she likes since it is something she is going to wear forever. This is symbolic for now.

Or, select the diamond, set it in a simple mounting, and you can pick out a mounting together later. If you shop at a reputable jeweler, you should be able to exchange or return your purchase within a reasonable amount of time.

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Dear Panel,

I am interested in a younger man whom I believe is interested in me, at least he keeps sending signals.

Also I am married, and so is he.

I think I am about 13 years older, but he sure has been making some suggestive moves.

I am semi-happily married, but it has been any thing but fun the past five years.
Should I pursue this guy just for fun?

– Missunderstood

Female, age 43, Southern USA

Only if you want to be semi-happily unmarried.

Aren't there other ways to have fun?

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Dear Panel,

I have been married 4 months to an Iraqi guy. I am Canadian.

I am lonely because he won't let me talk with any of my friends anymore, just Muslim women and I don't speak their language so I can't talk to them either.

What should I do?

– Iraqilover

Female, age 30, Canada

Learn to speak the Muslim women's language so you can talk to them.

But consider why you didn't realize before you got married that this guy was going to force you to abide by his rather strict religious and cultural customs. If you feel you can't live within his rules, and he won't change his controlling behavior (which is considered abusive in western culture), then you should figure out how to divorce as soon as possible.

I don't get it, my independent American female brain does not understand the meaning of "he won't let you".

I say talk to whom ever you choose, if he doesn't like it then he should have married a Muslim woman. Grow a backbone, sister, and stand up for yourself – if you don't, you are going to doom yourself to life of submission and loneliness.

I don't think this is a marriage made in heaven. Consider a good old-fashioned Canadian divorce.

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Dear Panel,

Me and my girlfriend have been dating for about 3 months and everything is so awesome. We have a really great relationship we both love each other very much.

The only problem is that she's scared to be in love with me because she knows/ thinks that this relationship will someday end. I have no intention of breaking up with her anytime soon, and I keep telling her she can't always be thinking about the future that she should just be and not worry about what's going to happen. I hurts me to have to think about us breaking up so I don't.

I guess she fears being hurt again by other guy (she had a bad relationship before me) so sometimes it could be very hard on me knowing there's nothing I can do. Or is there something I can?

Help me out here.

– BazPlaya

Male, age 18, USA

Tell her that the earth will someday fall into the sun, but I don't lose much sleep over that one, either.

Don't push. Trust will grow in time; if not – leave.

*NSYNC has a song about this – either them, or the Backstreet Boys.

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Dear Panel,

Will guys like me better if dye my hair blonde?

– Dull Ash-Brown Hair Girl

Female, age 16, Minneapolis

Sure! Don't forget the implants, the lipo, and learning how to giggle incessantly. You'll be a knock out!

Not unless they're shallow.

NEVER change yourself to get guyz!!!

If they don't like you now, they won't if you do.

Will it have purple highlights?

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